My Thoughts

I know it has been awhile since I posted something from my own personal life. I really am trying to talk about my life more but it's really hard to sometimes.

I'm not sure when I last mentioned what was going on with me, so I'll just pick a point and go from there. I've been going to a medical clinic in Houma, LA, for a while now. They've got me on blood pressure medicine for the first time in my life. Until a few months ago, I'd never had high blood pressure. In fact, I hit 200/120 one time at the clinic. I'm now down to 129/90 at my last appointment. So definitely in the right direction there.

The clinic has also been trying to figure out why I'm having trouble breathing. So far we've done a chest x-ray and an EKG and both were normal. I started using an inhaler again (I used one for years when i was younger due to asthma) and that didn't seem to be doing much. So, I was put on Azmacort as well, which is a maintenance inhaler. So far, nothing has changed. I'm actually doing worse! Next step is pulmonary tests (PFT's) in a couple weeks. Hopefully that will tell us something. The doc has said something sounds odd in my breathing though ... so I know it's not all in my head.

As for my pain, that's the same as it has been. Lucky me.

On a brighter note, we found a new mental health clinic for me to go to. It's a state-run clinic and I don't have to pay to go there. I won't get to see the psychiatrist there until December (unless they can get me in sooner), but I do get to start counseling sessions right away. As for the meds, my current clinic will keep doing those until I can see the new doctor. I really like the woman who will do my counseling so hopefully that will make me comfortable enough to share more than just the surface stuff. I'm not the world's most trusting person (my childhood taught me not to trust) so that is always an issue for me. Hopefully we can find the right balance of therapy and medication so that I can start feeling less depressed.

I've been thinking a lot about change. I'm not afraid of it. Earlier this week I told a good friend that she needed to be a catalyst for change in her own life if she was ever going to be happy. I don't regret saying it. I'm not one to mince words ... if I say it, it's because I've thought it out fully and I'm trying to help. That's what got me thinking about change in my own life. There are many things I cannot change, even though I wish I could. I'm always looking for ways to instigate some change in my life - even something really small. I guessed I could try harder to find ways. Well, I can try at least.

I thought I'd leave y'all on a happier note. I found out this week I really have some great friends online. Several sent me messages asking how I'm doing while others sent me words of encouragement. May not sound like much, but it means so much to me to know people care. Also, I got two great surprises this week. The first was when a friend of mine told me she got an iPod Nano. She already had 2 mp3 players and I jokingly asked for one of the old ones. Instead of doing that, she went behind my back to buy me one like hers in my favorite color. She's always been someone who went out of their way to try to make me happy. Well, it worked! The 2nd surprise was when another blogger friend of mine saw my post about looking for an iPhone. Well, turns out his husband had one of the older generation phones sitting in a drawer collecting dust. And he said I could have it! Let me tell you, they both made my day!

Until next time ...

This entry was posted on Saturday, September 26, 2009 and is filed under . You can leave a response and follow any responses to this entry through the Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom) .

2 comments

Wow, those are some great friends! I'm glad you have good people in your life these days! Hope everything goes well at the drs. and all.

Sorry I haven't 'visited' more recently, but I've been a busy fella over the past few weeks and haven't even been updating my own blog! Happy to read that there are some positive things going on with you. Keep smiling!
:-)