Well, I went to my appointment at the hospital clinic for what I thought was going to be my pulmonary function tests. Turns out it was an appointment to get me in their system and THEN they would schedule the tests.

I waited three MONTHS for that appointment. Would have been nice to know it was just a regular appointment. Then again, the NPC at my clinic thought it was the tests, too. The good thing is that now I am in their clinic system, it will be easier for me to get appointments for tests and such. I'm also going to be switching to their clinic for my medical care. They just have more doctors and able to give me better care. And it's free. Fortunately, the NPC at my current clinic understands and isn't taking it personally. Oh, and I got a free flu shot during my appointment.

The next day I got a letter in the mail from the clinic with my next two appointments in it.

Now that was fast!

So, next week (11/4) I go for the pulmonary tests, which I am NOT looking forward to now that I know how they work. And on the 14Th, I will see the doctor again. They also have a neurologist on staff who works with an anesthetician who does non-narcotic pain treatments. Hopefully, they'll be able to help get me a little more relief from my back and leg pain.

I have also seen my counselor since the last time I posted about myself. We actually had a very good session talking mostly about myself. We did talk about my brother and mother a bit, but my counselor has a great way of bringing everything back to me. That is not something I am good at. I have always been a person who concentrated on making sure others had what they needed because I didn't feel deserving of my own attention. It took a lot of years of feeling guilty about spending time focusing on myself. I also felt guilty for being as angry as I have been. Those days are over though.

So, I have homework for my next session. I am supposed to be thinking about what it is that I need from therapy. Honestly, I'm not sure. I do know that I need to find peace regarding the abuse I suffered as a small child. I also need to find a way to move past the mental and emotional abuse I have suffered because of my mother. That brings me to another question. If once I am at peace, do I even want a relationship with my family? Am I needing an apology from them or for them to even acknowledge what they've done? Well, better get thinking.

First, lets attack the elephant in the room.

I'm pissed that Mia is gone.

OK, I'm over it.

Week 1 usually shows us who can deal with the pressure and with a foreign dance style. For the most part, the dancers handled both pretty well. Unfortunately, the viewers wouldn't have a say in the outcome of the first elimination. I think the judges got it half right in the end. But first, my recap.

Channing & Phillip - Jive w/ Jason Gilkison - Phillip is kind of creepy and the facial expressions during this performance didn't help change my first impression. As for Channing, she seemed a bit hesitant. Minus the horrible lift in the middle, it was a decent performance overall.

Ashleigh & Jakob - Broadway w/ Tyce - First off, Jakob's outfit was hideous. Sequined tuxedo pants, a rugby shirt and a black bow tie? The costumer should be fired. Not sure I believed the chemistry between the two but Jakob's dancing was amazing.

Ariana & Peter - Hip-Hop w/ Nappie Tabs - If you hadn't been told that Peter was a tap dancer, you'd never known he wasn't adept at hip-hop. He really managed to get into the character and all his moves were sharp and hard-hitting. He easily outdanced Ariana.

Noelle & Russell - Foxtrot w/ Tony & Melanie - Well, Noelle injured her knee and wasn't able to dance. Like a few seasons ago with Pasha, Melanie filled in for the performance show. Normally when a b-boy or hip-hop dancer gets a ballroom routine, they crumble. Not Russell. He actually did pretty decently. As for Noelle, if she cannot dance again next week she will be taken out of the competition.

Bianca & Victor - Contemporary w/ Travis Wall - Victor was tremendous and Bianca easily held her own. Definitely will see these two next week.

Karen & Kevin - Cha-Cha w/ Tony & Melanie - Kevin was terrible, I thought. Karen showed exactly why she was one of the ballroom dancers chosen for the Top 20.

Ellanore & Ryan - Contemporary w/ Sonya - Sonya's choreography last season let me down a bit but this one was phenomenal. Easily the best chemistry between the two on the night.

Pauline & Brandon - Smooth Waltz w/ Jason Gilkison - With only being together for a day and a half, they did a decent job. Was one of the weaker performances though.

Kathryn & Legacy - Hip-Hop w/ Dave Scott - Dave Scott did a great job with this one. He made the two of them into cavemen, with Kathryn the one definitely in charge. I am not a fan of Legacy's but he was brilliant in this performance.

Mollee & Nathan - Disco w/ Doriana Sanchez - I cannot stand Doriana. It's like she is trying to kill the dancers with her routines. The lifts were incredible though. Also, Mollee was amazing. That's hard for me to say, too.

Bottom 4

Ariana & Pauline and Brandon & Russell

When they said Russell's name, the audience 'booed' very loudly - and they should have. Brandon was a good choice for the bottom but the other spot should have gone to Kevin. As for the girls, Pauline was a lock for the bottom but I was surprised to see Ariana there. Ariana's problem was the rest of the girls were just really good and she was just a notch lower. As for the solos, only Russell's was worth seeing. His problem will be finding a way to get better in other styles really quickly.

Who got the boot? Ariana and Brandon. Fortunately, we may get to see Brandon again next season!

As you may have watched last night, we have a pretty diverse Top 20. Contemporary/Jazz are still the dominant genres for the contestants but this year we have 2 hip-hop dancers, 3 tap dancers, 3 Latin ballroom dancers and even a 'krumper'. Here is a listing of those who will be competing for the title of "America's Favorite Dancer" :

The Guys

Nathan - The 17yo would got to Vegas via Season 5
Brandon - Got in when Billy Bell pulled out due to illness
Russell - First krump dancer to make it to the live shows
Phillip - Tap
Peter - Tap
Victor - Was the one who shaved his head for the judges in Vegas
Jakob - LOVE this guy! My favorite from the auditions
Legacy - B-boy
Kevin - Hip-hop
Ryan - Latin Ballroom

The Girls

Kathryn - Is this chick gonna cry every week?
Channing - Contemporary
Arianna - Jazz
Ellanore - Contemporary
Bianca - Tap dancer who's been on the cusp of the Top 20 for 3 seasons
Mollee - Annoying! Reminds me of Tatiana from American Idol
Noelle - She and Mollee became besties in Vegas. God help us.
Pauline - Sprained her ankle and missed half of Vegas and still made it
Karen - Latin Ballroom
Ashleigh - Made the Top 20 when Paula decided to take a movie contract

In the first performance show of the season, the producers decided to showcase the dancers dancing in their own styles. Good idea since a number of the Top 20 dancers were barely mentioned during the audition shows. Some highlights:

Wade Robson choreographed the first group number of the season. It was inspired by the 1930's club scene and had the dancers as 4 different "gangs" who meet up in a club. The music was awful but it was probably the best Top 20 group number of the series. Watching the tap dancers together made me miss Ryan Kasperzack even more - and his personality. As for the contemporary dancers, Jakob rocked Tyce's routine. All the dancers proved they deserve to be there but I'm sure once they start dancing out of their genres, that will change.

Also, a note for all fans of the show: viewers will not vote during the first two weeks of competition due to the baseball play-offs. The judges will be deciding who goes for the first two shows. Yeah, that's fair.

It has been a while since I have felt up to doing much. Today was the first day of some AMAZING weather, so I didn't want to waste it. We'd already planned on going to Walmart in Thibodaux today but Darin got the idea of checking out a restaurant called Spahr's. It's mostly a seafood cafe but they do have some non-seafood items like poboys, salad and pasta.

This was our appetizer - crab fingers. Unfortunately, they had been overfried and the crab dried up. All I could taste was overcooked breading. Not so good.

As for the rest of the meal, Darin tried their gumbo and was really impressed with it. He's won awards for his, so you know it has to be good for him to praise it so much. He also got the seafood platter (oysters, shrimp, crab fingers, stuffed crab, catfish, onion straws and fries) for us to share. I got a grilled chicken salad with honey mustard dressing. That's in the picture below. Also, I have to point out how awesome of their homemade dill tartar sauce was. I want a bottle of that stuff!

After lunch, we did our shopping at Walmart and our local market for meat. By the time we got home, I was really hurting but it was well worth it.

Can't wait til I feel this okay again so we can do a "date" day again. At least we'll have the great weather the rest of the weekend!

Well, it's time for me to let y'all know something I've been dealing with.

(You can stop bugging me now Karen!)

I posted before that I had been having breathing problems. Basically, I get short of breath way too easily now. I also have a weird problem. At times, it feels like I had the wind knocked out of me - and I'm laying down or sitting. I don't have to be doing anything at all and I just get this feeling like my breath is gone. It only happens for a moment, but it's not a great feeling. Plus, I tend to feel drained after.

Obviously, we're worried about this.

Well, at my last clinic appointment we discussed how I'm doing. I've started getting a weird cough at night and the breathing troubles have become worse and more frequent. I'd also had flu-like symptoms twice - both times with a 102-degree fever. During my last clinic appointment, I was having some of the symptoms again so they gave me a steroid shot and 5 days worth of prednisone to take. Fortunately, they didn't cause me to gain any weight.

They also told me a theory during the appointment.

I don't like it.

My Nurse Practitioner, whom I love, talked to the pharmacist about the medications I was on. I was on quite a few - still am. Well, they're concerned about my pain meds. As many know, I have very strong pain meds. They think it's possible that the meds have compromised my central nervous system. It would explain the breathing issues, as well as a few more. I can't even begin to think about this possibility.

On the way home from the clinic, it hit me.

It hit me HARD.

I'm already stressed, so I started to go into panic mode. What happens if they find out my meds are killing me? I can't live without them. I can't live with them. Not exactly something I need to be thinking about. Or even want to think about. But there I was, riding in the car with Darin, thinking about what my life could become - whichever way it goes. So, I called my counselor. We were 5 minutes away and she dropped what she was doing so that I could come see her. We talked and it calmed me down. If she couldn't have seen me, I would have turned around and gone straight to the hospital. It was that serious.

Possibly the scariest thing is that she told me I sounded like I was ready to admit myself when we talked on the phone.

Ya know, I was close.

Very Close.

Thankfully, I was able to pull myself out of the moment. I relaxed and waited a couple days to see if I could process things. I was able to. I'm still worried and not comfortable with the idea, but I've been able to convince myself to wait and see what happens. Hopefully, I can keep it up.

A Wisconsin woman decided it was a good idea to strip in front of her children.

No, she's not a stripper.

She's a shoplifter.

Julia Laack, 36, of Sheboygan had received a home visit from police after she shoplifted a bag of beef jerky and a lighter from a convenience store. At first, she refused to come to the door. Police heard her screaming and swearing at her three children in her house, telling one that this was his fault.

Then it got weird.

Laack stripped to her underwear because, in her logic, then they couldn't arrest her.

Obviously, this is one woman who has never seen the TV show, COPS.

A pair of panties ain't gonna keep them from cuffin' someone.

Oh, it gets even better!

While trying to arrest her, she managed to spit on officer and kick the other one in the groin. Then, while on the way to the police station, she exposed her rear end against the rear window.

How the hell was the woman able to do that?

And yes, she was drunk.

Way drunk.

Wouldn't you be proud to have this for a mom?

Maybe not, but it would provide a lot of entertainment.

I know I am behind on my Survivor recaps. So, this is a condensed recap of what has been going on since Day 6.

Last time, it was Betsy who became the latest bit of collateral damage in Russell's quest to become the greatest villain ever on Survivor. The question then became, would it just be voting to get rid of people he wanted gone or would the tribe actually develop of a brain and vote for the better of the tribe?

Fortunately, Jaisson felt Ben needed to go and others finally listened. I thought the look on Ben's face was priceless when Jeff announced he was voted out. That "WTF?" might be the best tribal moment this season.

Over in Galu, most of the women seem to think they're at Club Med. First, Russell chooses towels and pillows over cooking items at the reward challenge, earning him Dumbass of the Weak. Next, this past week's episode shows them doing YOGA! Thank God for Shambo! If it weren't for her, I would write off all women this season.

Although. As much as I love Shambo, she did a stupid thing ... she told Erik how to find the hidden Immunity Idol! And he found it! Dumb move Shambo. It's not like you have an alliance with him. Or do you? We really haven't gotten to see much about the politics at Galu to know whom is aligned with whom.

The leaders were told to pick two tribe members to go one a quest with them. The 3 people from each tribe competed in a game of Survivor bocce ball. Naturally, Galu won on Dave's final shot. They won chickens and while Shambo was trying to get an egg out back at camp, one got away. What a shocker.

During the immunity challenge, the teams had to race across net obstacles while carrying blocks. They then had to stack the blocks into one tall stack. nce they completed that, they races across a rope bridge to get to another pile of blocks. Then, they stacked those in one super-tall stack. Shockingly, Foa Foa won its first immunity challenge!

Of course, the first thoughts of the boot went straight to Shambo. Like her or not, the woman is keeping their tribe going. Russell wanted Monica gone for tanking the challenge. Others wanted Yasmin gone for being a waste of space around the camp. Which is more important? Well, this is the tribe where towels are more important than cooking gear and yoga takes preference to getting water and food. Of course, Yasmin got the boot.

Wow! It's already time for Vegas Week for Season 6. It still feels weird having the show on in the Fall still.

I won't get into a long recap of what happened in part 1 of Vegas week because I don't think they really showed us a whole lot, to be honest. Also, I'm sure the diehard fans have already read some spoilers out there. I've seen one that claims to be the Top 38 (19 girls/boys). I can't see I'm overly excited by that list because only a few are recognizable from last season or the auditions this season.

What I can say is that I am PISSED. Last season, we all fell in love with a couple of brothers named Evan and Ryan. In fact, the judges used their connection to make the final boy's spot "dramatic" by having them go up against each other. Evan was put through and made it all the way to the finale.

Ryan? I think we all figured we'd be voting for him this season. Wrong! He was cut! Just like Natalie last season, another fan-favorite was cut and shouldn't have been. Natalie was better than most, if not all, of the girls on last season. I'm sure the same will be true of Ryan this season.

The only other noteworthy thing that happened was that Teddy was cut. If you don't remember him, think 'plaid golf pants' and you'll remember.

I apologize for the lateness of this ...

In what may be the smartest move ever in first 3 days of a Survivor season, Russell began searching for the hidden immunity idol - without a single clue. Obviously, this guy thought about how he was going to compete prior to arriving in Samoa. I'm not sure anyone else did, though. From the look of it, it didn't take Russell long to find the idol hidden inside a tree in the middle of Foa Foa's camp. Is he the only one who has watched this show? I'm with him - I'd be searching for the idol my own self.

Say what you want about Russell, but he is playing the smartest game so far.

The same can't be said for Mike (aka Verosi). He seems to think that he isn't the weakest person in challenges. I'm sorry but even the dumb blondes were more useful doing the puzzle in the first challenge.

In the Reward/Immunity Challenge, the tribes had 3 players fighting for possession of balls that they had to get to one of their teammates up on a platform. That player would then try to throw the ball into the opposing tribe's basket. First tribe to 3 won immunity and fishing kit.

You know just by the description that things would get physical - and they did. In fact, Ben was kicked out of the challenge for using a cheap shot - for the first time in show history. The other interesting point in the game was when Mike took a hit so hard, he looked like he didn't know where he was afterward. He just kind of walked around aimlessly with his pants hanging down. Such a strong player, huh? After the challenge, Mike was having trouble breathing and had a bp of 92/60. The doctor pulled him out of the competition. This is why you don't cast an old, overweight, nonathletic guy and throw him into the wild and expect him to be able to handle it.

Once again, Galu won the challenge. After this victory, Galu's leader, Russell, was told to choose someone to go to Foa Foa's camp and observe, interact with the tribe and to receive the clue to the immunity idol. He chose Yasmin to go and I was so glad he did. It's always fun to see people get cocky on this show and she did not disappoint. She actually walked in there and said she was there to help them with strategy because they don't want a cakewalk. Um, when did Jeff say anything about strategy? Besides, there's only been two challenges at this point and she hasn't done anything strategic! From there, she spent a lot of her visit having a toddler argument with Ben. I really wanted to see those two start hitting.

Tribal Council wasn't really exciting. Russell wanted Betsy gone because she questioned his tactics. So, she is gone.

Foa Foa is now down three members to Galu. They better do something fast.

Imagine you're a high school student and a member of the school's dance team. You've been practicing for weeks with your team and right before the team is about to dance on the field, your coordinator makes you sit the bench.

Tough to take, right?

Now imagine the reason you're benched is because your hair isn't straight.

Yep, in St. James Parish (Vacherie, LA), D'ara Pillette was told she could not dance because her hair wasn't styled a certain way. Because of a medical condition, she wears her hair in an afro. The condition, folliculitis, causes the hair follicles to become inflamed, resulting in scalp burns and lost hair.

The school has said that their policy is based on Universal Dance Association rules, however, the UDA has said that their rules do NOT cover specific hair styles and that is up to the discretion of the team.

The school administration is allowing her to dance provided she wear her hair in a bun but that if she goes to nationals wearing an afro, she will not compete.

Is this fair?

I'm not supposed to do things where I have to be standing for any length of time. But, Darin has been really great the past few weeks at trying to keep me from going over the edge and I wanted to do something nice for him. I really shouldn't have done this after I already overdid things on Saturday to boot.

These are some of the cookies I made for him. Mine are usually good, but these came out perfect. I wish that were the case every time I make them!

And yes, he scarfed the first two.

I think I might be surprised if this person isn't the worst mother ever.

35-year-old Aimee Louise Sword of Waterford Township, MI, gave her son up for adoption over ten years ago. She recently used the Internet to find her son.

She found him.

Then, she seduced and raped him.

Yes, you read that correctly. The woman raped the son she gave up for adoption!

Prosecutor's have said the boy is still a minor but haven't disclosed if he knew it was his biological mother or not.

"I don't think I've heard of another case like this in my career," said Dr. Gerald Shiener, chief of Consultation and Liaison Psychiatry at Sinai Grace Hospital in Detroit. "I'm at a loss for words because it's something that we consider to be so out of the normal, so prohibited in every culture that it unnerves every man just to think about it."

Sword's attorney Kenneth Burch told the Press that his client "maintains her presumption of innocence" and said the accusations of incest have been very difficult for her.

But Sword herself has spoken since she first was arrested, writing on her MySpace page that she was inspired by rapper and former jailbird Lil' Kim because "she rises during the worst of obstacles."

Anyone else thoroughly disgusted here?

I understand feeling the need to seek out the child you gave up for adoption. That happens all the time. But how deranged do you have to be to seduce your child - knowing they are your child - and have sex with them? She deserves life in prison - just like the sentence she has now given her son.

Just as it was an SYTYCD first when the judges hit Phoenix, the show next traveled to Boston, MS, for the first time. This is also the first glimpse we got of Tyce and his overdramatics!

First of all, a BIG announcement. I was one of the people who tweeted to Nigel for this to happen! It is now official - ADAM SHANKMAN is now a resident judge! We'll get to see him during the boot camp and then on the live shows.

How awesome is that? Unlike Nigel, he belongs on the judging panel!

The first person to catch my eye was a dancer named Teddy. Okay, it was actually his pants that caught my eye - they were plaid golf pants. Even scarier is that he searched for them online! Fortunately his dancing was anything but scary. I even saw glimpses of some potential acting ability as well.

Check him out for yourself!


The second was an ice cream scooper name Channing. She was as powerful as one of the guys, but there was also a feminine side to her. The judges sent her to choreography, but she is still headed to Vegas!